Sometimes I feel like I am babysitting an adorable little baby girl and I wonder when the real, responsible parents who know what they are doing are going to pick her up and take her away. (But suggest to Elisa that you are going to take Eden away and watch the protective maternal instinct express itself full-force). I love Eden, and have so much fun watching her and I cannot believe she is ours. Even after months of being pregnant it still seems surreal that my life, my role, my identity have changed forever. FOREVER. That is a long time. No matter how good the day has gone with her or how much rest we are able to get through the night it is really challenging to adjust to this new existence. I am still me but I am a version of myself that has been benched for the last 25 years.
I have a difficult time taking care of everyone, including myself. I do not really know how to now. It seems the things that relaxed me before suddenly do not have the same effect. Before Eden was born my responsibilities were to better myself and to help Chad be happy and successful. I love my role as a wife! It is really the best in the world. Now I feel like I am neglecting Chad. Every time I feel overwhelmed and want to ask for his help I feel like I am not filling my role as a mom and I feel guilty for putting more responsibility on him.
On a less emotional girl note, somehow our bedroom has become a hangout for mosquitoes as the weather gets cooler. Luckily Eden and Chad have gone unscathed for the most part but I am a different story. Plus I seem to be more allergic to mosquitos than the average person. I have big welts all over my hands and arms that are lasting (and iching) for days. Stupid bugs!
The other day Jenny Tomlinson came over to take some newborn photos of Eden. We undressed her and tried to get some good pictures of her little naked baby body. She started to cooperate by relaxing and taking a nap. I held her all scrunched up on my chest and she let loose. There was a nice constant stream. What a girl!
We cleaned her up and continued shooting the photos. Later she was curled up on a scarf laid over a beautiful antique chair. This time we were blessed with more than a sweet little stream of fluid. We couldn’t stop laughing and Jenny was such a good sport.
Yesterday we had a whole day adventure! All of us (Mom, Gramma, and our little fam) took the train to Glarus. Jenny Tomlinson had arranged for us to then be transported to a little village to see the cows come down from their six-month stay in the Alps. They say the altitude makes the milk better. Some friends of Jenny’s were bringing their own cows down the mountain as well.
We all waited around and then heard the bells coming. The traffic was stopped in both directions as the cows came around the bend in the road and headed for the pastures. It was SO loud. We were all shouting over the noise to each other. Eden was sound asleep the whole time! Good thing we already know she has excellent hearing or we’d be worried. The cows were decorated in flowers and big, heavy bells. The farmers had to wrestle the cows to undress them.
The day got a little long for Eden. We were away for 8 hours in all. Considering her age, that was 3% of her life up to this point.
It was an experience that I am glad we got to have. Truly Swiss and great timing for having Mom and Gramma here. I could tell it was just perfect for Mom. She was having a blast and did her best to get right in on the action of wrangling the cows.
